How to talk to children about difficult things

(ORDO NEWS) — In conditions where absolutely nothing is clear, it is very important to try to keep your mind and calmness.

Children now do not understand even more, so our main task is to make sure that they do not get lost in the amount of information either. In this material, Popular Mechanics has collected advice from psychologists and educators for talking with children.

Don’t rush to answer

If you hear a question on a difficult topic from a child, you will most likely need to think a little longer, advises Anna Nikitina, head of the Stop Threat security school branch in Yekaterinburg. Ask him as many clarifying questions as possible – most likely, his interest is very specific.

You can ask a child who told him about this, what this person thinks, how he himself thinks what exactly is happening, whether he remembers examples of such events, for example, from books he read.

Be mindful of the age of the person in front of you

It is unlikely that third-graders will understand your explanation of the intricacies of diplomacy and the peculiarities of the structure of the world.

For them, it is necessary to simplify the presentation of information as much as possible – but not to play around and lie, but to retell the most simple and indisputable postulates. At the same time, teenagers and high school students will be more willing to discuss difficult topics with you and perceive them.

Call a spade a spade

Clinical psychologist Dmitry Klochkov separately emphasizes that “our psyche does not tolerate emptiness.” “You can tell a small child that war is when people shoot, tanks drive, ” Klochkov explained.

It’s scary, dangerous, but you need to stay away. There is nothing worse than some kind of secret, reticence. And if you pretend that nothing is happening, then this will only add to the anxiety. Speak directly, but according to age.

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You can’t know everything

In some topics, you will not always be ready to give your assessment or share your opinion. If you don’t know how to answer a question, don’t try to come up with something. Invite the child to find the answers together, to sort it out with you.

Do you understand what to do

Child psychologist Dima Zitser advises by all means to show that something is definitely within your power. “The feeling of security does not come from the fact that mom and dad are lying and pretending that everything is in order – it comes from the fact that mom and dad demonstrate an understanding of what to do in this situation,” Zitzer explains.

In his opinion, it is necessary to show what situation you are in, that you think that you are doing everything right, that nothing bad will happen to you. “Our task is to create this feeling of understanding and confidence, based on the characteristics of the place and the moment,” the psychologist emphasized .

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